GUM.
GIVE US
MONEY.
That’s what GUM stands for.
We considered something inspirational. We considered something clever. Then we remembered what we’re actually here for.
Because money is a lot like gum.
WE WANT IT TO STICK IN OUR POCKETS.
That’s basically the level of thinking that went into this.
AN EXTREMELY SIMPLE CONCEPT.
That’s GUM.
Just an extremely transparent transfer of wealth in our direction.
WE’RE NOT.
We’re just raising money. There is an important difference.
We simply woke up in a world where having more money seemed preferable to having less money.
So we made a website.
NOTHING.
Absolutely nothing.
You don’t even get gum. We cannot emphasize this enough.
GUM DOES NOT SELL GUM.
Frankly, introducing an actual product at this stage would only complicate our business model.
SELECT YOUR
FINANCIAL MISTAKE.
No tiers. No menu. Just tell PayPal how much of a financial mistake you'd like to make.
FAQ.
IS THIS FOR A GOOD CAUSE?+
No.
Please do not confuse us with good people doing important things.
There are excellent charities doing genuinely meaningful work. This isn’t one of them.
GUM exists for one purpose: getting your money to stick to us.
WHERE DOES MY MONEY GO?+
Into our pockets. Metaphorically.
Probably through a bank first.
But “GUM: Your Money Will Be Electronically Processed Through a Regulated Payment Provider” wasn’t nearly as catchy.
WHAT WILL YOU SPEND IT ON?+
Could be anything.
Groceries. Bills. Coffee. Holidays. Something responsible. Something completely idiotic.
Maybe we’ll just look at the bank balance occasionally and whisper: “GUM is working.”
We make no promises. That’s sort of our thing.
WHY WOULD I GIVE YOU MONEY?+
We have no idea. That’s the fascinating part.
Maybe you find this funny. Maybe you have €2 you don’t particularly respect. Maybe you’ve made excellent financial decisions your entire life and would finally like to make a bad one.
Maybe you’re drunk.
If it’s the last one, come back tomorrow. We want your money, but we would like you to remember giving it to us.
IS GUM A SCAM?+
That would require considerably more effort.
Scammers normally promise you something. We are promising you nothing.
Our pitch is literally: “Can we have some money?” You say yes or no. That’s the entire operation.
If anything, we’re suffering from an excess of transparency.
IF YOU GIVE US MONEY,
WE WILL HAVE
MORE MONEY.
That’s it. That’s the guarantee.
We don’t have lawyers.
CHANGE THE WORLD.
DISRUPT INDUSTRIES.
BUILD THE FUTURE.
WE WANT €5.
Ideally more. But let’s start there.
Give us money →PAINFULLY CORPORATE.
HONESTY
We want your money.
TRANSPARENCY
We told you we want your money.
SIMPLICITY
You give us money.
GROWTH
You give us more money.
SUSTAINABILITY
You continue giving us money.
THIS IS STARTING TO SOUND ALARMINGLY LIKE A REAL COMPANY.
YOU MADE IT THIS FAR WITHOUT GIVING US MONEY.
Impressive.
Fix that →